Saturday, October 27, 2007
alrights. so many things happened
i reallly dun know where to start.
jsut back from bangkok.
has only been a few days,
and something shocking happened
my grandfather passed away
i really regretted.
i din even get to see him for the last time.
at the last day of the funeral, everyone cried
i did too.
it was such a heartbreaking scene
seeing my granny so heartbroken
i thought all these will bring the family closer
however. all the uncles n aunties
not all. but some really pissed me off.
dun show that F'ed face in front of me.
who are you? just ask urself first.
and for those who JUS CANt think
i pity u guys.
seriuosly, i lost respect for so many pple.
suddenly i feel that all along everyone's just putting an act
i sort of seen thru everyone's move
they dun place kinship on top of everything
ok well.. enough of that.
when everything was over.
my com died on me
the graphics card went haywire
i had to get a new one.
what abt sch? i guess its just the first wekk
i still can handle everything.
well many things happened lately.
conflicts? misunderstandings?
shant talk about them.
i know i shant feel this way.
i know
but, its really makes me feel abit insecure
makes me feel that im useless
i have nothing
im not capable of anything
it just make me compare myself to him
makes me feel so far away
makes me feel so small, so insignificant
i totallly lost all confidence
even for my passion
nvm.
sometimes i really hate bloggin
it makes me feel so depressed.
who will ever know ?
i`ve made a wish ;
10:52 PM
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
ok guys i am alright
thanks for all the concern
appreciated
just back from bangkok trip with family.
could have said kinda enjoyable
and i bought lotsa stuffs there
wahahahx i shall upload the pics one day.
i`ve made a wish ;
12:10 AM
haven benn blogging for months
but i reallly cant take it anymore
not any longer.
yes i ran of house last night
if not for the sake of my mum
i wouldnt even step home
stop abusing ur authority
stop telling me whats respect
i only know whats mutual respect
easy understood yea?
i've lived 18 years
n thanks. u made me felt one thing last night that i nvr felt before
you made me felt that i dun even have a place called home
18 years. congrats. you completely broke me into parts
everything will stay in my head
i wun forrget a single detail
it was that most painful night ever
i swear it was the hardest cry eveer
but fret not.
i'll step out of the house early in the morning
i'll come back only in wee hours
i'd rather stay at the void deck
i''d rather get stared by werid onlookers
home? nah
its the last place i ever wannt to go right now.
im trying very hard to stay calm
i always felt that people who try to do stupid things to themselves are dumb
but i have a change of point of view now.
this is how they relive stress
this is how they feel better
you'll definitely regret it one day
i`ve made a wish ;
12:00 AM
